Winter visitations
Two days ago, I returned to Kyoto from New Zealand. Suddenly, the sultry southern-hemispheric days have been replaced with an insidious chill that I only notice when I set out on my bike to replenish my larder, and decide it is too late to return for a pair of gloves.
Someone has been using my house while I’ve been away, and although they have made an effort to remove the traces of their presence, my house as it was five weeks ago remains like a snapshot in my head, and I notice with a start where the lamp has been unplugged, the sofa moved back, a curtain caught in the sliding window. And in the garden there are traces of another visitation:
returning to my Kyoto garden
long stalks bowed to the hard ground
the long-gone snow
March 6, 2008 at 7:01 pm
Thanks for this, Richard. I deleted the tags because they looked fussy. We are still in experimental days. One question: how can you greet something long-gone?
March 6, 2008 at 11:01 pm
hi Richard. i really like the mystery and tension created in the second paragraph. for me, the piece starts here. i also like the idea of shifting the atmosphere to nature in the haiku
March 16, 2008 at 9:21 am
Thanks durojaiye, I have altered the poem to reduce the personification and open it up a bit.
March 16, 2008 at 4:10 pm
All the better for absence of ‘greets’. Losing the ‘the’ in the 2nd line would be another suggestion – not that you’re asking for one, of course!