Melting Snow

.

A veil is shed

From the distant Paps of Ohara:

The jay knocks down

More melting snow.

(Mount Ogura, Kyoto, 11.2.11)

5 Responses to “Melting Snow”

  1. Black Mountains–
    the stagnant chill
    of snowmelt

    Alan Summers
    1. HI #60 (2005)
    2. Haiku Friends ed. Masaharu Hirata, Osaka 2003
    3. MATCH 1 SESSION 3 “SNOWMELT”/”MELTING SNOW” (KIGO) June 2002

  2. david mccullough Says:

    The Paps of Ohara are the two smaller hils to the left of Hieizan when looking north from downtown Kyoto. ‘Paps’, meaning breasts or udders, is used in Scotland to describe two rounded hills of equal size. Thanks for the winter warmth Stephen.

    • You know your Paps, David! You got it exactly right. A fine pair, as viewed from distant Saga, especially with snow on. You mention Scotland: Ireland, too, of course – the Paps of Anu in Kerry, being a good example. What are those two Ohara hills called in Japanese?

  3. Richard Donovan Says:

    I like the balanced dualities:

    — two paps;
    — two things descending;
    — two groupings of double lines (both with enjambement after the verbs);
    — a colon (two dots) cleaving (both cutting and holding together) the two halves;
    — and the palindromic date, 11.2.11, in which the sum of the digits in each part is two.

    • You missed the two ‘o’s in Kyoto!
      Seriously, though, your comments were received with interest. I’ve always been a fan of the short Chinese quatrains, which do the same sort of thing – contrasting two scenes by phrasing them in parallel.

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