This entry was posted on February 28, 2013 at 9:11 am and is filed under Tanka, Travel . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
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2 Responses to “West and East”
Thanks, Nori. Is this Hawaii? I managed to meld your original two posts into one. Hopefully this is now OK?
Posting photos with poetry is always a tricky matter. You may have noticed that, following Gerald’s comment on the last post (‘stone’), I have deleted the photo originally meant to go with my haiku there. Reason: although the deer was not visible in the photo, the photo contained too much distracting/confusing information. Possibly it spoilt the impact of the little sound. Your two photos perfectly match the imagery in the tanka, but might they also be detracting from the imaginative effect the poem alone would have had? I will not delete either of them, however, as this dialogue is an interesting one and others may feel differently. There is certainly an incremental beauty in including them.
As to the English version of the tanka you have given us, I wonder if your 3rd line might not be better as:
And over in the East
… and your 4th and 5th together as:
Sombre clouds cut into by
So there’s plenty to chew on!