light snow —
the bird’s tracks turn
toward spring
………….. (Bandit, Minnesota, USA)
thud, sounds the earth
of falling pecans
above, a squirrel tail flickers
………….. (Sydney Solis, Florida, USA)
Little white petals
dancing in the wind —
redstart wears two
………….. (Mai Segawa, Asuka, Nara)
deep underground
snails dream
turquoise stars
………….. (Robert MacLean, B.C., Canada)
Monks’ chanting
resonates in the Amitabha Hall —
a pinkish lotus flower sways
………….. (Ayako Kurokawa, Kyoto)
Comments by Sosui (Nobuyuki Yuasa):
Tito sent me a list of ten inbox haiku and asked me to choose a few for posting. At my request, he also sent me an additional list containing five more poems, mostly by Japanese poets writing in English. I decided to choose four poems from the first list and one from the second. They are all very good, I think, but some of them might need reworking. Basho kept on revising his poems all through his life. I believe that haiku requires two phases — that of the particular moment itself and subsequently that of eternity. The poems I have chosen have all succeeded in catching a beautiful moment, but I think more work might be needed to elevate them to the level of haiku containing a hint of eternity.
I found No.1 very delicate. I especially enjoyed the warm eyes of the poet looking at the bird tracks on the snow.
No. 2 has a nice image of the flickering tail of a squirrel, very impressive as it is difficult to catch.
No.3 reminded me of a similar experience I had years ago. A white-eye came to suck honey from a camellia and flew away with red petals on its head. An experience of this kind stays in your mind for a long time.
No. 4 is perhaps the most beautiful poem in the list, but it gave me an impression of too much contrivance. Surely snails are more humble creatures?
No. 5 evokes a beautiful image of a temple with a lotus pond. I found, though, the last line rather misleading. Especially, I wondered why the poet had chosen the word ‘pinkish’ rather than ‘pink’. For me, it destroys the beautiful image of a temple.
Icebox 